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I woke up in September

Waiting for this year to end.

Some people say things like "This whatever is/has been the worst of my life"  But I can factually say 2018 has been the worst year of my life so far.  It started out being compared to my brother-in-law. February, I lost my job. March, my sister told me they were pregnant. April, I found out we were expecting, then lost it. May, I lost prospect for my job, then I attempted on my life.  June, Traci started to separate from me. July, she decided to divorce me.  August, she kicked me out of the house and pushed me out of her life.

Now, it's September, and every day is extending the longest it's been since we've talked.  And now, I write things stuff down even though no one reads this.  Neil doesn't respond to me anymore, Josh does but he's in an awful position. Michael, Emma, and I are going out tomorrow night since I don't work on Sunday. It'll be my first time going out since everything, and I'm terrified.

I got my tattoo this week.  And now, I have to live for myself.  And for now, I just have to wait.

I can be patient.

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